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RISE UP!

FUNDRAISER UPDATE!

Our goal is to raise $10,000 by making 100 necklaces at $100 each.

My husband and I are donating our own money for all he materials needed to make the necklaces and for shipping and packaging as well.( $3 tacked on is to cover the credit card processing fee)

This way when someone purchases a necklace the ENTIRE $100 goes directly to O.U.R (operation Underground Railroad)

Please watch video above for more info.

TO PURCHASE DONATION NECKLACE:

To DONATE WITHOUT A PURCHASE or better yet on top of your purchase here CLICK HERE

"Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness, but instead expose them. Ephesians "5:11 ESV

"OUR LADY OF GUADALUPE”

This necklace is named Our Lady of Guadalupe. She remains a powerful symbol of Mexican identity and faith, and her image is associated with everything from motherhood to feminism to social justice (scroll to bottom for more info on her). Our goal is to raise $10,000 by making 100 necklaces at $100 each. My husband and I are donating our own money for all he materials needed to make the necklaces and for shipping and packaging as well. The $3 tacked on is to cover the credit card processing fee. This way when someone purchases a necklace the ENTIRE $100 goes directly to O.U.R (operation Underground Railroad) More on Our Lady of Guadalupe: According to lore, it was a winter’s day in 1531 when the Virgin Mary first appeared to Juan Diego, a peasant, as he was crossing a hillside near present-day Mexico City. She appeared as a dark-skinned woman who spoke Nahuatl, Juan Diego’s native language. This woman asked Juan Diego to build her a little house, a casita, on the hill. Twice Juan Diego reported this to his local bishop, who didn’t believe him. The second time, the bishop asked for proof of the apparitions. Early on the morning of December 12th, the lady appeared again to Juan Diego and told him to gather some flowers at the top of the hill – a strange request because flowers were not in season in December. Juan Diego did as he was instructed, and found an array of Castilian roses. The lady helped him arrange them in his tilma (cloak), and he returned to the bishop with them as evidence. As Juan Diego presented the tilma to the bishop, the flowers tumbled out and the two men discovered a life-size image of the Virgin Mary on the inside of the cloak. This image is known as Our Lady of Guadalupe. To Jeanette Rodriguez, author of Our Lady of Guadalupe: Faith and Empowerment Among Mexican-American Women, there are aspects of this story that make it unique. She finds it significant that the apparition chose to appear to a peasant. “That makes sense, because God always chooses the people the world rejects,” she said. “The Lady of Guadalupe also offered a different brand of faith. She didn’t say, go to church or say the rosary. She said ‘If you love me, trust me and believe in me, I will respond.’” STONES USED: ROSE QUARTZ: Rose Quartz is the stone of universal love. It restores trust and harmony in relationships, encouraging unconditional love. Rose Quartz purifies and opens the heart at all levels to promote love, self-love, friendship, deep inner healing and feelings of peace. This stones gentle energy helps kids learn unconditional love, forgiveness, and compassion. ... Rose Quartz brings a deep inner healing, enhancing self love, self trust, self worth and self confidence. BLACK COCONUT SHELL: Smashing the coconut is symbolic of annihilating the ego and humbling oneself before God. Whenever a work of magnitude is undertaken it is natural for the persons involved to feel a sense of pride at what they are setting out to achieve or what they have achieved. This ritual indicates that the actual “doer” is God and humans are merely instruments in his hands. – complete submission to God. The Sunday before Easter, often called Palm Sunday, is a reminder of Jesus Christ’s triumphal entry into Jerusalem to celebrate the Passover. As He rode a donkey into the city, crowds scattered palm branches along Jesus’ path. (See Matt. 21:6–11.) 14kt gold, sterling silver, rose gold. (Please allow up to 8 weeks for delivery)

Copyright 2020

Am I still the sick girl since I have been all my life?

Or am a Phoenix rising from the ashes of of hellish torture?

Fortunately I am choosing the Phoenix.....I always wanted to fly.....so here goes.

Age 33 was lovely......divorced, bankrupt and losing both my homes, while I worked my ass off. None of this was due to be being lazy. I worked 5 jobs to try to get our mortgages paid through the recession. Basically I allowed men to live off of me during those years for money. I chose to take it so I knew what I was doing. Somehow I thought they would return the love. I was buying LOVE.

 

I bought over $100,000 worth of love from a man and ended up with nothing. No voice, no power, no money, no kids, no husband, no dreams. Too many dreams had left....I was a shell of woman with only despair and everyone looking at me like I am an idiot since I bailed him out of all his debt while I worked for it.​

Realizing at age 33 my soul was crushed in ways I couldn't even imagine. My dreams ran out and no way to take care of myself since my health problems were escalating and the economy was horrible at the time. No apology, no love....just despair and health issues spiraling out of control.

34- Met the love of my life! But before I knew it I was ripping him to shreds in my head on our first date. Like every woman does if the guy is too nice. Most women I know anyway.

A loud voice screamed in my head at the dinner table "Just shut the hell up and enjoy your dinner! He just drove your butt all the way up to Seattle to your favorite restaurant....just enjoy the company and be polite."

At that point I submitted and said ok I will just ditch him after dinner, but have fun in meantime.

Once he kissed me it was all over......I love this man so much my heart aches all the time with love for him. This is the true love I had always been searching for. Seeing him as a Father to his boys made me fall even more in love with him.

This man has truly helped me find the way to me. The real Jessica without sickness. The girl always hiding her true self only showing what she thought others wanted to see to make them happy. Never realizing in the end she was always left unhappy and none came to rescue her like she did for so many others.

So then I turned 38 and spent well over $100,000 to get pregnant or adopt. It was a shit show how that all went down. Anyone who knows me knows this was impossible. Hardly able to keep my body up at this point as the pain was increasing big time daily. I was beyond desperate but just kept doing what I always do...acted my way into saying I am fine. I would sob through the day and night silently from pain.....never ending physical pain. I would beg God to help me. My pain grew so intense I would have no other choice than to sit there for hours paralyzed by pain.

I will never forget the news of being diagnosed with Lyme Disease. Hit me so hard....silently plotting my suicide. That's what my Dad did so may as well follow....his chronic pain ate him alive. He was in so much physical pain he couldn’t function.

But once my doctor calmed me down I felt better thinking well at least I have insurance to cover it. I finally after 38 years of pain know WHY!

Ya no such luck. Insurance doesn't cover that disease and don't forget this is the disease that makes you look crazy and people will accuse you of faking it. Awesome......now what?!

And.....that's when I took matters into my own hands.

I was so far down the hole of despair at that point all I could see was black. Black sticky tar.....dragging my body through it. Screaming at me to keep moving because if I stop moving I won't be able to get back up.

I knew suicide was not the answer. My Mom already lived through my Dad's suicide....can't do that to her.

Walking up all night never having sleep taught me just how much I needed to love myself. I sobbed for hours and days and days sobbing out all the trauma to let this shit go once and for all. I had no clue how much my body held onto trauma.

All my organs had shut down and i dropped to 98 pounds. All the doctors told me to make sure and eat even when it was coming out the same way it went in. Didn't matter what I ate it I was unable to digest anything. At this point i had none who could help me....but me.

I chose LIFE

I chose LIGHT

I chose to rise like the PHOENIX

I slowly started to see myself for who I really was.....a scared girl too afraid to show herself. Not the bitch I made myself out to be.

This blog is about my path and the many crazy ways I learned to heal when I took matter into my own hands to become my own Doctor.

Who Am I?

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