LOVE MATRIX

Right now has never been more important to unite in love. Unite with all beings. Unite with love in our hearts. Unite with Christ consciousness. Unite with fire in our bellies burning brighter than we could have ever imagined.

Join me as a lightworker today. Lightworkers all over the world are rising to be a part of the new matrix.

A matrix of love. A matrix of unity. A matrix where darkness controlling us cannot exist.

MEDITATION:

(For a recorded version of this mediation please email me at jalexander7795@gmail.com)

Envision yourself floating in space. Your hands are held with another souls hands. These souls are pure light bodies emanating from the beyond.

All you see and feel is light bodies holding hands in unity.

Breathe in the light. Breathe in the power of love. Breathe in your power as a powerful lightworker.

Now breathe out.

Your exhale is transmuting any darkness on the planet into light. Pure divine love like you have never felt before.

As you are breathing, envision all the many light beings moving in closer and closer to one another to form a web around earth. A web of divine feminine rising at this time.

A web of pure unconditional love so sweet and divine all you can do is rejoice. Love heals all.

As we circle in closer to the planet this new matrix of a web is casting out all darkness. This creates the web to be an even stronger vibration of love the closer we move towards earth.

We are transmuting the darkness by embracing our sovereignty.

Now see yourself as extending your wings of love out while you are still holding hands with the other light beings.

You are now emanating your own unique sovereignty wing to wing as a collective. A collective that is unstoppable.

Keep breathing in and exhaling the love…...a love so intense your body vibrates into the matrix of love.

Our weapon is love.

As we get closer to earth we are holding all beings who are lost and unable to see the light.

These beings are adults but they are just scared children trying their best to find the light. We must love them to be freed of the bondage of darkness.

We are holding these scared beings in love until they can feel nothing else but love with our breath. Bathing them in Christ consciousness. By our actions of refusing to leave them behind we emanate love by bathing them in the light of love.

See theirs scared faces. See how they are just like us. We are no better. We are all light.

The web is bathing our beautiful holy mother Sophia Gaia in love.

We are the light.

We are the way.

We are the power.

We are birthing a new world. Not just America. The entire world.

RISE RISE RISE!!!

Am I still the sick girl since I have been all my life?

Or am a Phoenix rising from the ashes of of hellish torture?

Fortunately I am choosing the Phoenix.....I always wanted to fly.....so here goes.

Age 33 was lovely......divorced, bankrupt and losing both my homes, while I worked my ass off. None of this was due to be being lazy. I worked 5 jobs to try to get our mortgages paid through the recession. Basically I allowed men to live off of me during those years for money. I chose to take it so I knew what I was doing. Somehow I thought they would return the love. I was buying LOVE.

I bought over $100,000 worth of love from a man and ended up with nothing. No voice, no power, no money, no kids, no husband, no dreams. Too many dreams had left....I was a shell of woman with only despair and everyone looking at me like I am an idiot since I bailed him out of all his debt while I worked for it.

Realizing at age 33 my soul was crushed in ways I couldn't even imagine. My dreams ran out and no way to take care of myself since my health problems were escalating and the economy was horrible at the time. No apology, no love....just despair and health issues spiraling out of control.

34- Met the love of my life! But before I knew it I was ripping him to shreds in my head on our first date. Like every woman does if the guy is too nice. Most women I know anyway.

A loud voice screamed in my head at the dinner table "Just shut the hell up and enjoy your dinner! He just drove your butt all the way up to Seattle to your favorite restaurant....just enjoy the company and be polite."

At that point I submitted and said ok I will just ditch him after dinner, but have fun in meantime.

Once he kissed me it was all over......I love this man so much my heart aches all the time with love for him. This is the true love I had always been searching for. Seeing him as a Father to his boys made me fall even more in love with him.

This man has truly helped me find the way to me. The real Jessica without sickness. The girl always hiding her true self only showing what she thought others wanted to see to make them happy. Never realizing in the end she was always left unhappy and none came to rescue her like she did for so many others.

So then I turned 38 and spent well over $100,000 to get pregnant or adopt. It was a shit show how that all went down. Anyone who knows me knows this was impossible. Hardly able to keep my body up at this point as the pain was increasing big time daily. I was beyond desperate but just kept doing what I always do...acted my way into saying I am fine. I would sob through the day and night silently from pain.....never ending physical pain. I would beg God to help me. My pain grew so intense I would have no other choice than to sit there for hours paralyzed by pain.

I will never forget the news of being diagnosed with Lyme Disease. Hit me so hard....silently plotting my suicide. That's what my Dad did so may as well follow....his chronic pain ate him alive. He was in so much physical pain he couldn’t function.

But once my doctor calmed me down I felt better thinking well at least I have insurance to cover it. I finally after 38 years of pain know WHY!

Ya no such luck. Insurance doesn't cover that disease and don't forget this is the disease that makes you look crazy and people will accuse you of faking it. Awesome......now what?!

And.....that's when I took matters into my own hands.

I was so far down the hole of despair at that point all I could see was black. Black sticky tar.....dragging my body through it. Screaming at me to keep moving because if I stop moving I won't be able to get back up.

I knew suicide was not the answer. My Mom already lived through my Dad's suicide....can't do that to her.

Walking up all night never having sleep taught me just how much I needed to love myself. I sobbed for hours and days and days sobbing out all the trauma to let this shit go once and for all. I had no clue how much my body held onto trauma.

All my organs had shut down and i dropped to 98 pounds. All the doctors told me to make sure and eat even when it was coming out the same way it went in. Didn't matter what I ate it I was unable to digest anything. At this point i had none who could help me....but me.

I chose LIFE

I chose LIGHT

I chose to rise like the PHOENIX

I slowly started to see myself for who I really was.....a scared girl too afraid to show herself. Not the bitch I made myself out to be.

This blog is about my path and the many crazy ways I learned to heal when I took matter into my own hands to become my own Doctor.

JA WITH love

LOVE MATRIX

Who Am I?